becoming your own

go through life is one thing but becoming your own person is a journey of its own. when you go through life you go through birth school and the "real world". you deal with little kids teasing you for being different. then move on  to trying to find a crowd to fit in with. you find your crush and sometimes you end up with your crush.but you know you still in your "shy" phase. see high school you meet up hopefully with the same crowd to make it through the 4years of hell with. some people meet others that act better than the originals.

once high school is over, some of the friendships you had will be over and thats when the eye openers begin. college is like the wild jungle. you get mixed up in different organizations and start hanging with people that are TOO much like you. but as you continue on your journey you quickly see that the ones who smile are the ones who really plot. fact of the matter is as you grow you will eventually be on your own. but those who call themselves your family will never leave you. you might be in one place and their in another but if its true yall will link back up some how.

p.s your family will always have your back but your "friends" always come with a limit

games

when i was 5 years old, my mom being a single mother. taught me how to play numbers. i was bucked up i knew how to play so i started challenging every chick i seen. so one day my big cousin Mallery set me down and taught  me 6 more. so i started playing those games with all the females on the block and at school. the dudes wouldnt play thinking its gay not knowing all the females was diggin it. so i continued to play and some girls were jealous that i was playing with others cause they thought they were my only friend.

well when i got older the games got all little different. it turned from just playing with hands to playing with mouths. but the crazy part is the reaction to different friends got a little bigger. so i thought about it and came up with a strange solution.

see as children we learn games as a way to commute or socialize with others or the opposite sex. but as we get older we see that those games come with a much bigger consequence. like you can really get killed behind games especially with the opposite sex. see some of us as a child played those games and never left them in the past. the only thing is they have learned to twist it up in their own way. so once the games get bigger emotions seem to get involved.

p.s dont  alter people feelins if you dont want yours messed with

faith

Faith is the substance of things hoped for evidence of things not seen. so how far does faith take you. well it depends on how strong your faith is and what/who is your faith in. as we live and realize that everything we do God is in it. whether its bad good nasty or clean. the thing i learned today is that with even the smallest amount of faith...you can go very far. faith is not just believing its doing.

in order to build an empire you have to have faith that the materials you have is strong enough to withstand any obstacle. the trick is...you need to show the effort in order to reap the rewards. i know i may sound corny but the day you drop your faith is the day you will realize that fighting alone will get you no where. if you dont have any one on your side you need God on your side.

p.s- prayer without work is nothing

perseverance and image

so i was watching this episode of House, which is a show about doctors. one in particular named House, who was the boss of most of the staff. well he has a way to get his point across whether its being arrogant, jerkish, assholish or whatever. so on the episode he was trying to find out how this CIA patient became ill. now perseverance plays a part simple because, he was wrong 5times but never gave up. although he didnt show he was trying he demanded many types of treatment until the man finally showed some improvement. now i know that can only happen in a show, but that shouldnt deprive you from persevering in real life.

so i sit back and watch how some people are soo worried about how they look to others. why???? its funny because you go out and spend all this money to try and impress others and then find out their not worried about you. i wish people would stop worrying about their physical image and focus on the mental and characteristic image. in todays world you can be dressed horribly but be more paid than anyone walking around you. you can look like you woke up and just walked out the house but be smarter than anyone that challenges you. no matter what they say mental will always over power physical.

p.s if you feel its right then dont give up, with faith and work in the end you will come out on top

purpose

two people who enjoys each other company is always labled as 3 things. friends, lovers, fuck buddies. but why? is it possible that two people can just like to be around each other without having any type of title to them. the thing is, everyone looking in sees two people that seems to be attracted to each other so their obviously having sex. the fuuny thing is, for the people actually in the situation, sees someone that has purpose to them. that person could make them smile in the worst of times, they could comfort them like no other can, they could know that person inside and out, but what constitutes that their in a relationship or even like each other.

remember when i spoke on envy, well its showing up again. i am envying one of my friends because of their study habbits. usually they are up singing, smokig talking about females. but now they are trying so hard to keep their eyes open, simply because they want to better themselves educationally. now i believe this is the good type of envy, but is there really good and bad envy. tnats another subject for another day. but for the most i will say that tonight, i will try to be like that. its time to crack down and sense todays world is known for following the crowd. i will follow and see what happens.

p.s.everything that happens has a purpose......WHATS YOURS????

a Blessing

i remember my first semester at my current school and the people i met were out of this world, and truthfully i still dont know why im cool with them. i do know i am glad to say i met this wonderful individual named Blessing. a smart young lady from Africa. now before i met her i had the impression that everyone from the motherland was mean and stuck up. but Blessing is different in so many ways.

she has the personality of an angel, and the voice of a shy lauren Hill. everyday she greets me in a different way without knowing it. i have never seen her with a frown on her face, and suprisingly she has never cursed/disrespected someone. which makes me state that the city you live in can not influence the attitude you have in life.

well back to the topic, she is a singer. and that is the real reason wehy i wrote this. i feel she has a voice that needs to be heard and a style that the world needs to take notes on. every song that i have heard so far has been heartfelt and 4 the most part she can be the next BLESSING. she is tru;y a blessing to the world, and a inspiration to everyone around her.

p.s. character comes from within....no one can change that but YOU

my downfall

you know i sit and watch most of my friends live out some parts of life i wish i could. then i take a second look and see what they had to sacrafice to enjoy that lifestyle. i mean yes on the outside it seems like they living it up, on their own, having fun and making their own rules. but ontop of all that, their responsibility level has to be through the roof, more people to answer to and more "green" leaving their hands.

funny thing is, i seem to always envy instead of being thankful. dont get me wrong i thank God everyday for allowing me to breathe, walk, talk, sleep, skip, hump, all the good things that happens daily. but some part of me wants more.

have you ever set back and wondered, since im doing all this for others and slowly transformig, when can i see the rewards I DESIRE instead of the rewards i NEED? it sounds crazy and ungrateful i know but truly its not, its just a lust for lifes treasures.

p.s. patience is everything but envy is a BITCH

hard times

my bestie Martika tells me i need to stop smoking. i agree but its difficult when thats the only thing that covers my fears/problems. see the truth of the matter is, i have no one in my house to talk to. its just me and my mom and she always sleep or at work. so that leaves me with tons of problems that i might not know how to get out of so the easiest thing to do is blow it away.

one big problem is my heart missing deraneka francis. for some reason i cant stop thinking of her. when we was together, i didnt really appreciate her but now that were apart i cant stop thinking of ways to make her happy. the only problem is i feel she is wayyy better off without me. i mean she is smart and hardworking and someone like me will do nothing but tare her down. and that is not my main priority. well tonight i will find out how my heart feels. we are meeting up to talk so i will let yall know how it went.

p.s use your heart when it comes to happiness,,,your mind will have you miserable 

crazy plans. greatness in front me.

ok so me and my brother Tevin always coming up with some retarded plan or activity for the day. so today we decide to buy smoking pipes. man these damn things so cold, we bought some tobacco to put inside of them. that was the worst idea ever, that smoke so damn strong it burned all the back of my throak. so we said lets put some "medication" in it. that was the best plan ever....... we were pain free for hours. hell im still pain free.

well yesternite i saw one of the greatsest things happen in life. my friend/brother fullfilled part of his dream, he was on stage for 10 minutes and made a group of people laugh. my son Jose can really make it to the top. he has his own style of comedy and hes not afraid to say everything thats on his mind..............

the business

the business is confusing to some, easy to others and just not made for most. you have to look at the game from a "im hungry" point of view. if you want food on your plate you  have to be the best you can be. you have to stay infront of everybody and everything. yo cant be scared to take a couple of licks. they may hurt at that time, but wounds heal with time. and hey pain is only temporary

you know the worst part of living is pain. thats why its kinda funny when people say pain is temporary, because you go through your whole life enduring it. whether its physically with sexual abuse domestic violence child abuse to falling off your bike and getting that fresh new SCAR on your leg or climbing a fence and falling and breaking your arm. or it could be mentally with words like "you know you a dog ass nigga dat dont care about nobody feelings" or "mamma im hungry my stomach starting to hurt>momma>just roll over and die you wont feel it".

For some reason that pain is still temporary. because the bottom line no one can ever really hurt you but yourself and God. You are the only one that physically hurt you by staying down when you feel the "pain" is too much to bare. you can only hurt yourself mentally by hanging your head when others try to drag you down. the more you hold your held up and stay focus on the future, the more the pain becomes incurious to the pain. meaning you wont let what anybody say or do stop/deter you from reaching your goal. 

p.s stay loyal to those who are loyal to you....the others arent worth the stress..

new discoveries

so today i hung with a old yet new friend....my son Jeromeo. he cool peoples, we get along with the same type of people. although he from a rough and somewhat stereotyped neighborhood, he is one of those people that proves not everything people say is true. wait......wait i didnt mention that i got a B on my English test which shocked the hell out me. but anyways after he hoped a plane at school while i cruised on a wine, i went to visit my sis Swipa.

My thing with Swipa is she is a strong and hardworking girl, she just dont believe in herself enough. my biggest prayer is that she let go of what her people say and strive to be the best for her and jojo. O yea and my son Joka got off house arrest....my son finally able to leave the porch...lrl. but after i rushed home to change and scooped romeo up, then we met up with the fam. i was surprised to see my bestest person in the whole world at the movie premiere. Taylor and my baby momma Tyren was there with the loud but loveable Cookie.

The movie was very good and grabbed my attention quickly. which brings me to my title. i discovered that no matter where you come from, if your energy is positive, your new family can get along with your old family. I was happy to see my old fam accept one of my new bros so well. but on the low....he wants cookie(like everyone else).
                  p.s if you give people a chance they may just shock you........

First blog

my family

my family is crazy but i would be lost without them. so in this blog i will name all the people i call family and explain why they are in my life. first i will start with Gieselle i have been knowing this girl since i was 6 years old and funny thing is she is still the same. she wild and outgoing but has the drive of a hustler and i love her to be around because she gives that energy to people around her. next is markeisha...i know the name sound ghetto but she is the blackest white girl i know. she has that i dont care attitude and thats what makes her so special. she can also be dingy but hey we all have our times. next is my brother darryl. this man is soo difficult to try and explain. he is quiet but dont let that fool you cause this man is the sneakiest out the bunch. he is the second half of the freak crew. Dominique is the achieved one so far. he did what we all wanted to do and got away from home. his humor is intelligent so its hard to get sometimes. 


Misha is the shortest and one of the feistiest. i have grown to love her like a sister, she is the oldest of my other lil sisters. i also met Jasmine who is 16 with the mind of a 25year old and the mentality of a 50 year old. Spyda is one person i can say i can call on for whatever. most of the things i do now i learned from him. Denzel...what can i say. this man has been getting me in trouble since we were 11 but has been there to take some falls with me. Crystal is the sister that you want to hate but cant find any grounds to hate her on. Jasmine e...is one of the recent members and the most cared for. she is the mother of my little princess ebonee and is a wild child that needs to be set free. 


Fred is the pretty boy of the group. a white dude with dreads and the mentality of a hoodstar. jeremy is that dude. to say he gets in alot of trouble and we the altercations we had, he still a ride or die dude and thats what really matter. Karissa is the oldest and the meanest to those she dont know. to me she is a strong minded female that needs to learn to fly on her own. she is the mother of my little angle Ja'Milla. Noonie is her little sister and originally my first friend. she is feisty to the point some people cant handle her. Jose is a character of his own. this man can make you laugh in the worst situations. cookie is the youngster in the fam. she treats you exactly how you would treat her. 


Last for now but not least, the sister i love the most Yavyron. she is the smallest of us all but the most dangerous. i love this girl like we were really blood.i dont know where i would be if i never met her. i would kill anybody for this girl. 


there are plenty more but i just named the important ones and the ones that are near and dear to my heart. p.s just because i didnt name you doesnt mean your not special to me.

whats going on

i have no clue whats going on with my body. for the past couple of days my stomach has been acting a donkey with me. i dont know if its something i ate or a punishment i have to go through, all i know is that this is getting on my nerves. it has me waking up at all times of the night. well since im up i might as well blog and watch one of my favorite movies.


speaking of my favorite movie, the main character Ice Cube is one of my favorite rappers. he started gangster rap but also changed the image of all hard core rappers. he started screaming f the police, and now he is running around with kids and comedians making mad "gwop". but hey i guess we all have to change sometime in our life. atleast he changed for the better and not the worst like some rappers have now and days.

 p.s. mentally changing for the better is growing as a person but physically sometimes is for the public benefit.

the beginning

well this is my first blog and i have alot to say. i will allow this one to be my intro. hi people out there in website land. My name is Corbin but everyone knows me as Supaman or Sup. i was born and raised in new orleans to a single mother that has instilled alot of fear in me. I am active , loud and loves to eat pussy. i dont really know how this blog thing works but as time goes on i bet i will get the hang of it.


                  p.s nothing in life comes without hard work.